When you realise this - you should have a plan to get back into balance as quickly as possible. This may mean leaving the comfort of every out-of-balance group and setting out on your own path as a solitary seeker once more. This requires grown up bravery. Don't bother with recriminations or sharing your understandings with the out-of-balance comfort group - instead - quietly thank them and sort out any issues or stuff peacefully if the opportunity exists. Then move on and reflect on the dynamics, the victimhood and the illusions that were used to bind the out-of-balance group together and make a plan that such notions will never happen for you in your future.
This is the Way of the Seeker. To create balance and harmony you should not look outside, you should look inside. You must use the knowledge and experience of your outside life to assemble the wisdom to create your own balance and harmony inside. Then because you have changed yourself - your outer world changes too.
Our ancestors saw their world as being of two complimentary halves – male and female. Their gods and goddesses worked to preserve the balance of harmony. With harmony great progress is possible, but without that harmony chaos ensues causing shortages, misery and stagnation. Problems appear when any group becomes a gender based group or has a single gender god or goddess to ‘worship’. Such groups are cults and the cult leader speaks for the god or goddess... This system also requires a ‘hate’ figure who is used as a binder in that the entire group hates the same person. In the most bizarre sense the hate figure is the opposite of the cult leader. If you, as a seeker, find your self in a group that has a hated person / gender / group you will, if you look with open eyes, see that there is a cult leader too who speaks for the selected god / goddess. Run!
Cult leaders are power tripping and totally out of balance with the idea of harmony. We, as seekers, need to reconnect with the partnership idea to get back into balance. We should try to transform any "dominator" model to a "partnership" model. The dominator model includes ‘patriarchy’ which means the rule of the father and ‘matriarchy’ which means rule of the mother. They can both be generalised to mean rule by men or women and by extension ‘gods and goddesses’. A ‘partnership’ path is a better balanced path for all seekers and it is desirable because it is more emotionally healthy than the patriarchal or matriarchal options available today.
Or imagine all the above said another way - that there was only a male god in charge... In no time at all he’d be out of balance and angry and grumpy and cause hurt and fear and panic and his people would be sad. Or - imagine all the above said another way - that there was only a female goddess in charge... In no time at all she’d be out of balance and angry and grumpy and cause hurt and fear and panic and her people would be sad. Then imagine the partnership option of a god and goddess, we get a sew-saw with ups and downs, he gets better ideas about some things, she gets better ideas about some things but together they seek to create balance and harmony. There would be no room for cult leaders but there would be room for co-operation in partnership co-creating a future.